Alcoholics on a Hippopotamus
December 4th 2005 to March 4th 2006
|
Subject:
alcoholics on a hippopotamus
From:
fred
To:
dirtfarmer
reference
picture: http://m-w.com/mw/art/hippopot.htm
am i right in thinking that you know your liquors pretty well?
i am seeking to start a little liquor cabinet, but i would like to stock
it with
some good quality products...
this idea may have to go away if i find that i am a lush.
if you do know some very tasty varieties of: (1) rum, (2) vodka, (3)
gin,
then i would be very pleased to know what you know.
also feel free to suggest other liquors that might be useful. i
doubt i
will get
something like scotch though, since there seem to be about a
thousand
"best" varieties and all of them smell and taste like rocket
fuel,
which is to say, and i want to be extremely clear in saying this,
that
they all taste very bad. of course taste is an acquired taste, but
i hear
that it plans to liquidate and sell the assets.
so, i appeal to your refined southern culture and skills in gentlemanly
deportment
to instruct me in the ways of refined grains and so forth...
-fred
-----------------------------------------------
Subject:
Re: alcoholics on a hippopotamus
From:
dirtfarmer
To: fred
Now there's a question I can get into...
Yes, I know my fair share of liquors. My staple is bourbon.
Bourbon is a
type of
whiskey, like scotch, but costs less and tastes better. It's not
bourbon
unless it comes from Kentucky. Maker's Mark is the one to keep on
hand, or
Jack Daniels (although technically not a bourbon because it comes
from
Tennessee), or Wild Turkey. Bourbon is a Southern Gentleman's
staple
liquor,
it's like keeping milk and butter on hand, okay. If you want to
drink
a fine
bourbon neat, or on the rocks, try some Basil Hayden --it is not
particularly
strong, but very smooth, so it is good to sip. The higher proof
bourbons
have a strong bite on the palette. Woodford Reserve is another
fave,
a little
darker and stronger, but still very smooth. My favorite bourbon
drink is
the Mint Julep. It requires fresh mint, a simple syrup, and a
little
prep
time to let the mint oils dissolve in the bourbon before shaking with
ice
until
the shaker freezes over. For the best julep, put a sprig or two
of mint
standing
up in the glass so you have to put your nose in it to drink.
MMmmmmmmm!
Don't bother keeping scotch on hand. Respond to any request with
"Yankee!"
or
"No, as a matter of fact, I'm Norse.", or simply "Go Fish!"
Vodka (as a bourbon drinker, i think mostly all tastes the same).
There
are
hints of flavors in the expensive boutique varieties, but you'd be fine
with a
bottle of Sky, Absolute, Grey Goose or go for a pretty bottle (it's
allright,
they all taste like watered down rubbing alcohol). I think most
women
drink vodka drinks, because it doesn't taste like alcohol in a mixed
drink.
Many standard drinks call for Vodka--bloody marys, sea breeze,
screwdrivers,
gimlets... white russians (kahluah vodka cream over
ice).
Rum. I prefer (and this isn't an easy one to find, for some
reason) Don Q
Cristal.
It is a clear rum from Puerto Rico (i don't like their dark rum,
though).
Mix with coke and lime to make a Cuba Libra. Aside from that, I
think
Bacardi is everyone's standard. If you like rum, keep clear and
dark
rums on
hand. The spiced rums are good, but limit which drinks you can
make,
I think,
and somehow never end up in my cabinet. They're best for mulled
cider
though. Of course, so is bourbon.
Gin. I like Tanqueray and Bombay Sapphire. I'm sure there
are others
just as
good, I quit drinking gin a while back, I've got beefeater in the
cabinet
now. Gins flavor predominates most of its drinks so it's more
important
to get a decent gin, I think. Don't forget to stock olives and a
small
bottle of dry vermouth. Get individual bottles of tonic water,
not a
liter or
two liter, it doesn't keep even for an hour. You'll find a lot of
martini
drinkers use vodka instead of gin.
Don't forget tequila. If you don't drink margaritas all the time,
get a
good
tequila for the wild hair up your ass shot swiggin. I recommend
Tres
Generacions
Commemorativo, or Sauza. Yum! Also, a margarita with just
good
tequila
and lime juice with salted rim and splash of Triple Sec or Grand
Marnier
are the best. (Like vermouth, I use triple sec sparingly and
don't
get a
large bottle.)
Liquors to keep:
Kahluah
Vermouth
Triple Sec
Grenadine
Amaretto (Saronna)
Amarula (sp?) this is a fairly new cream liquor from Africa. I
love it. Smoother than irish cream.
Bitters (angostura?)
Was this too basic? Do you want more boutique liquor
suggestions? Do you
already
know all these liquors? Do you really not have a stocked liquor
cabinet?
Are you trying to stock liquors for mixing drinks, or are you gonna
make
like Liz Taylor in Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolf and guzzle this shit
straight?
Or my mom, who used to like just a sip of something good before
bed-time.
|
|